The little girl in our house has reached the terrible twos. The mama in this house? She’s learning a whole ton about patience… and trying not to pull her hair out at the constant phrase, “I don’t want that.”
Time to get dressed? “I don’t want that.” Time to put on shoes? “I DON’T want that.” Time to walk out the door? “I DON’T WANT THAT.” She grows more and more insistent. She gets angrier and angrier. Then she gets red in the face and screams bloody murder. Just writing this seems to amp up my blood pressure.
I have to remind myself to breathe… a lot. I have to remind myself: she’s still figuring out language. I have to remind myself: she doesn’t know how to quite express herself — like going back and forth about wanting or not wanting socks on during nap time.
I keep trying to picture myself in her shoes. What is it that she’s fighting against? Or for? Is she trying to make her own decisions? She acts like little miss independent more and more, and it’s like she’s testing me to see what I do when she changes her mind about wearing socks for the zillionth time. Or eating her meal of mac & cheese. Or deciding which doll or stuffed animal she wants to put a diaper on.
Then again, it’s not really about me. Being a mom has never been about me. It’s about her, about taking care of her and teaching her how to navigate this crazy world. But sometimes even that sentiment, honestly, doesn’t make the hours of the day any easier.
I guess this isn’t a guide to the terrible twos so much as it’s a stand for solidarity: I feel for you mama. Because I’m right there with you.
Take a deep breath.
Know that it will be okay and know that she’ll grow out of this … someday.
Lastly, but certainly not least, know you’re far from alone. This too shall pass… although I remember giving that advice to a mommy friend of mine, and, exasperated after month’s of her baby not sleeping she said she was tempted to write in glow-in-the-dark marker on his forehead, “this too shall pass.” All ages have their own challenges, that’s for sure.
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ou are not alone… and I’m not just talking about the fact that we, as moms, can never seem to go to the bathroom alone (even on Mother’s Day). You are not alone, in the sense that we’re all dealing with temper tantrums on any given day. And know that I’m right there with you when bedtime hits, and you’re ready for that glass of wine, or two.
Through all this though, sometimes I also feel like little miss knows my limit. The other day after a long day of her battling me at every turn, we approached bedtime, and she asked to read and carried over a whole stack of books. So we sat on the couch cuddling, reading book after book. In that moment, I’m reminded again of why I wanted to be a mom in the first place: for moments like this. I mean the world to her, and she means the world to me… even on the not so easiest of days.
Cheers to you mamas, wherever you are — and thank you for doing all that you do this Mother’s Day and every day.
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