I’ll be honest. Potty training my almost 3-year-old scared the crap out of me. (Pun totally intended). I think it was a combination of not wanting to deal with accidents – especially when out and about, not wanting to believe she was growing up, and just hoping she’d just “do it” one day.
Potty training is inevitable
We have a ton of choices when it comes to parenting, like what parenting style we use, where we send our kids to school (or if we home school), and even, heck, how we dress our kids. But potty training – like feeding our children – is a necessity. Every kid, at some point, is going to need to be taught how to use the toilet.
Fortunately for me, a few people recommended the “Oh Crap Potty Training” book. I bought it… and then it sat on my living room side table for months. “I’m just not ready!” I kept telling my husband.
Then I started thinking about her attending preschool in the Fall. What if it took MONTHS to get her adjusted to the potty? So I bucked up and started reading “Oh Crap” while nursing my newborn. (Yep, I made it all the more difficult on myself by waiting til after the baby was born; fear and procrastination are friends).
Potty training is about mindset
But, you know what? The first chapter was all about mindset: about getting my head in the right place and understanding that this was an “opportunity” to teach my kiddo. It wasn’t something to fear, but a chance to teach… and in the end, I’d be thrilled when I saw how proud Little Miss was of learning this very important milestone.
So we dove in. Like all in. My husband insisted that we do naptime and nighttime training too as the book suggested. Again fear reared it’s ugly head. But what about cleaning up all the sheets? All the laundry? I can’t do all that with a newborn! These were the thoughts running through my head – all the excuses I told myself of why I couldn’t do it…
Sounds a lot like what fear does to us, doesn’t it? Makes something sound so much more difficult and stressful than the actual act of doing it really is?
Life Lessons
Chances are there’s something you’ve always wanted to try, but there’s some niggling voice in your head telling you that you can’t, or that it’ll be too hard, or what if things go wrong… what if, what if, what if. All those what if scenarios stop you dead in your tracks and then you make NO progress.
But chances are? If you step past that fear, if you decide, heck, I’m going to learn as much about it as I can to prepare myself, and then go for it anyway? It won’t be nearly as scary as you think it might be.
Did potty training happen without a hitch then? Heck no! (I’m sitting behind my computer writing this and laughing, thinking of all the bumps of frustration along the way). There were a LOT of accidents, especially at first. There was cleaning up pee – and yep, even some poop. There were many days in a row of washing sheets. Have I taken this metaphor too far yet? 😉
It’s All About Mindset
Then one day, my sweet and stubborn 3-year-old turned to me and said, “I don’t want to pee pee in my bed anymore.” Guess what? Since then she hasn’t. (Well, except once with pee, because she had wayyy too much water to drink before bed; more our fault on that score than hers! And one time with poop — but it amazingly could have been much, much worse than it was.)
Mindset is a crazy thing. At the end of the day, we have a choice when it comes to fear. We can let it hold us back and stop us from doing something — whether it’s potty training or otherwise — or we can say, screw it, I’m going for it anyway and hoping for the best.
Chances are you’ll be surprised at the results. I know my daughter was… because there came a day where things clicked for her, and she declared, “I did it mama!” with the biggest smile on her face.
When you step past fear, you’ll discover capabilities you didn’t know you had either… but hopefully it won’t be nearly as messy as potty training.
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