Don’t get me wrong. I love putting together fun activities and games for my kids. I also think it’s pretty clear from this here blog that I’m a fan of crafts with my kids too. But I also think boredom is important too. That’s why I’m also a big fan of stepping back and letting my kids get bored.
Boredom — and slowing down — leads to imagination. It forces kids to become more self-aware. It’s an opportunity to discover their interests and, in the process, get creative. Or heck, even more simply, to discover a toy they long forgot about.
Boredom is a fact of life. Plus, I can’t plan every single moment of their day (at least not without stressing out). So it’s a good thing that a little boredom can be a good thing, especially since we’ve been home A LOT in the last few months of the pandemic.
Teach Kids about Boredom Through Quiet Time
When we first instituted quiet time, I saw what boredom did to my daughter. It made her feel a bit uneasy, as it does with many people. Then the complaints started rolling in. She asked me for things to do. So I googled, read blogs, looked at Pinterest… and I offered quiet-time boxes.
The boxes gave her a choice for when she was bored and unsure of what to do. In other words, they steered her into figuring out how to deal with boredom but still gave her options. They were a huge hit. She loved them, as long as I rotated the activities they included.
But pretty soon, as quiet-time became a new “norm,” she also started to lean into the “boredom” and quiet space. The first time she asked me for “quiet time” I was shocked; my non-stop talker wanted… quiet?
Kids Need Space and Independence
Yep. Quiet, “boredom,” and space. She realized how much she loved her down time, especially on busy days. In the process, she got creative. She found ways to engage in independent play.
For example, she started to created whole towns with her toy houses and figurines. She started telling stories with her characters (although don’t tell her that’s what she’s doing; she’ll tell me “no, mom! It’s not a story. I’m just playing!) She discovered that she could choose how she spent her time, and it was as if a light bulb had gone off in her developing brain.
More Reasons to Embrace ‘Boredom’
I think there’s this idea out there that we need to keep our kids engaged and active, constantly. But research shows time and time again that boredom can help our brains work in different — and more creative — ways. As an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Florida, Erin Westgate, told CNN: “We should help them” — kids — “learn how to deal with downtime and monotony.”
For younger kids, we may need to “steer” their boredom at first, through things like quiet-time boxes — which is still what we’re doing with my son, who is currently three years old. But as kids get older, simply scheduling “down time” for the day — that doesn’t include devices! — can lead to healthy ways of dealing with boredom.
As with most things with kids, leaning in to boredom can take time, but watching what your kids create and do when they’re not told how to spend their time? It can be pretty magical.
Another unexpected result of letting kids figure out boredom? Parents can get a bit of “me time” in the process…. even if it only lasts for 10 minutes.
What are your thoughts on kids and boredom? I’d love to hear from you in the comments.
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