A couple weekends ago, before heading out of town, I needed to get Kafka the bulldog over to his DogVacay sitter who lived a good four miles away. This didn’t used to be a big deal. I’d throw his travel kennel, food, and toys into the car, load the dog up, and go.
Not anymore. With Little Miss in the equation, combined with city living — aka, my car is parked out on the street — things are a little bit tricky. Let’s just say this story ends with Kafka winding the leash around my legs, me nearly falling on a mound of ice, and then the diaper bag fell, and somehow I dropped the dog’s bag of food too… which made Kafka even more excited to be getting into the car. To top it off, Little Miss started getting angry about being in the carrier.
“I can do this,” I said to myself under my breath… again and again and again. And somehow I did. Somehow we all got into the car, and somehow we all got out.
But it got me thinking. There’s a lot of things I tend to repeat to myself on any given day. Sure I may post all the cute and adorable moments on Facebook — all my favorite parts of my day — but motherhood also involves a lot of building ourselves up and talking ourselves through some things. I knew, surely, I couldn’t be the only one… so I took a poll online in some of my mom’s groups. Thankfully I learned that I wasn’t (totally) crazy.
In fact, there’s a lot of things moms say to themselves to get through the day. Here’s just 20 of them.
Sometimes it’s just another version of “I can do this.”
“Deep breath before you react.”
“Remember: This is what I wanted.”
“Dear God give me patience.”
For others, it’s a reminder that “this too shall pass” — and Winter will be over eventually — whether they’re sahms, wahms, or work outside the home…
“Just keep swimming, just keep f*ing swimming.”
“One day…maybe not today…but one day, I am going to miss this so I better enjoy every moment.”
“Spring is coming…spring is coming…”
“I can’t wait to get home and see my lovey doveys!” (I go from one job to the next, but it’s all good as my heart yearns for them).
“I am his world, I am his everything. He needs me and it will be okay, this won’t last forever.”
“My mom gifted me with an old school rhyme for when I look at the state of my home; “simmer down dishes, dust don’t make a peep, my baby is (insert verb here, i.e. Sleeping), and babies don’t keep.””
Sometimes the only motivation needed is thinking about how bedtime is bound to get here (eventually)…
“5 pm will come soon. 5 pm will come soon.”
“I’m going to really enjoy that bottle of wine tonight.”
“Daddy gets home in X hours!”
Others are simply reminders…
“They are lucky they are cute and I made them.”
When all else fails? Some sing or try to laugh.
“I am constantly humming Trace Atkins ‘You’re gonna miss this’ to myself.”
“I also sing My Little Pony songs!”
“Laugh or cry, laugh or cry. I choose laughter.”
“When I’m at my end I yell or scream ‘you’re driving me crazy’ in the funniest voice I can to my little one. Gets some emotions out and she laughs hysterically at me. Makes me smile.”
Last but certainly not least, moms try to refocus on the good…
“I tell my kiddo ‘I love you’ both when frustrated and in the good moments. When I say when I am frustrated it makes me refocus.”
“I am strong, I can do anything… I say this out loud often – even though my daughter is only 9 months old, I want her to always see her momma as strong and self confidant, rather than frustrated and self deprecating (which is definitely my default when things get tough).”
“I try to remember that one day they will grow up and not ask, ‘mamma play?’ They will go off to college and I will cry and yearn to play with them, plead with them and hold them.”
Of course this list could go on and on and on, and since writing this, I’ve added a few of my own to my day.
After all, motherhood can often feel pretty lonely, which naturally leads to talking to ourselves. But at least we know that we’re not alone in our craziness.
What are some things you say to yourself to get through the day?
